i suspect

what lies between
these words
is your only reality

i suspect

it's how you live:
an onion of layers
and the smoke of illusion

i analyze your every word
though i would hate
to find

what i am looking for

because behind it all
is where

you are

and i don't want to know you


i go on pretending
that i believe your love
that is my choice

and also my own illusion

i fight my heart
doubting your guilt always

but i know excuses are useless

except for yours

you are free
guiltless, blameless, free
but what you can't accept
is that no one believes that

but you

you are so good at this game
no one will ever win
in the end

why do i play ?
i can only guess

perhaps because
your insanity is compelling
and it all looks way to good